“It should not be denied… that being footloose has always exhilarated us. It is associated in our minds with escape from history and oppression and law and irksome obligations, with absolute freedom, and the road has always led West.” taken from into the wild

Thanks you life for sometimes you bump me across interesting people. Had a conversation with a friend or let me say a confession as this is an era of those to name IIT confessions se lekar all college confessions. There was a time in my life when i had come back from a village and found myself totally lost in the city. It was one of those evenings when i found my brother kneeling before one of my neighbors and  he making fun of him just because we were from village and did not know the english or anything else like them. This was probably the most important day of my life because on that i had decided that i will show them in my own way. From that day to the journey of this day has been wonderful.They talk of year on year growth at b schools , we must see the growth of some of the guys i have met and they will realize everything is vanity.

I don’t now how the talk today came on our CAT exams when a friend told me his story. You must listen to him once for i will never be able to bring out the essence. It goes like this that this friend of mine was very very weak in english , to an extent that he could hardly speak anything till standard six. So he landed up in a small fight at school and landed up in the principals office. He could not comprehend what the master had to say and just kept on shaking his head in the affirmative.Later when his father told him that why he did not wanted to study in the school he just laughed off saying that he could not understand what his principal had to say. We also laughed off but there was something that small thing which made me realize that really life is wonderful. To the kid carrying his dad’s credit card and ordering a subway enumerating all the minute specifications he wants , my friend , me and many others may appear as foolish but somewhere the fun of life is all about all those small things in life.

I am a very professional guy and quite formal too. Even if the company has offered me a huge sum of money to spend daily on accommodation and travel I know i will be modest and return the rest like a good boy because  i have always been like that. The whole post reminds me and so does the evening of the day i wrote my cat in the evening slot. I brought in professionalism because i was playing football for a club and being payed. On the day of exam i was supposed to play in the morning and i could have excused my self but i knew the team needed me. I had to tell a lie , i told mom that i had exam in the morning slot and later called up that i had messed up and i had my exam in the evening slot and that there was no point in returning back. I played the game , went and rested for sometime in a restaurant and wrote my exam. I know you may laugh at me , call it ridiculous just like the hundreds who think that Chris from Into the wild was a recluse and made a wrong choice. Let me be honest , in life if you don’t do these things then there would be no meaning to life.

Find below a pic from rishikesh , a place where i am happy really happy.


To all the friends there you all are wonderful.

Contemporary Nomad

“Here as we sit in this beautiful and peaceful spot,in the shadow of the mighty Himalayas,with the forest around us putting on a new mantle of spring,with every current of wind bringing with it the sweet smell of flowers,and with the air throbbing with the joyful songs of great multitude of birds,we can forget for a spell,the strains and stresses of our world, and savour the world of the jungle folk.” —— Jim Corbett,Jungle Love.

How does it feel to return to a place after a long time to find nothing has changed? To find that one nut from the door  still missing,white paint on brown background with names scribbled,the same old makeshift pencil stands with a different user ,pencil writings on the wall speaking of internal struggles,the Tata motors logo still firmly stuck to the door and so on.But above all these is a feeling of being there,looking from one end of the corridor to the other,the clothes,the shoes,the dustbins and  of stretching  your arms and looking up at the stars, wondering of a life the place had to offer.When you have played so much football at a place you can easily picture the undulations in the field even  in your sleep but nothing could be more gratifying than stepping on the holy place itself. When I passed out of college I dictated terms to the juniors and it was amazing to find myself on the other side with a junior putting fundaes on shooting the ball.2 days is a small time to re live your life at college but i did it with football,Andhra mess,GRT,Gurnath,campus cafe,department all with some high spirits.I had left an unfinished business at college and probably it was destined to happen this way.I have a strong faith in destiny and this one thing was something I had always wanted to do and  so it was bound to happen,I ran the Road race track in 48 minutes and in the end promised myself to do the same whenever I return to college again.

410,Ganga Hostel

15 days,16 nights(9 on train).If you join Ranchi-Delhi-Kathgodam-Corbett-Nanital-VrindavanGurgaon-Banglore-Chennai-Ranchi it makes a huge circle on the map.Take a 40 hour train ride in a sleeper coach in summer just to meet a friend, I promise you will understand the meaning of friendship.Run a half marathon in the heat your definition of heat will change. Celebrate one b day at least with a set of new people(I celebrated it with sadhus at Vrindavan) and you will start valuing your life even more.Visit your Alma mater just for no reason and you will start finding  joy in small things.Just pack your bags and step into the next train and you will become a contemporary nomad.Sometimes hunger,heat,lack of sleep,friends,smoke and above all train journeys is what one needs to understand what living is all about.

On the rails

For an athlete there is a unique sole-soul connection which only he can understand. It is amazing that how a battered shoe sole can instil a confidence in a runner. It is somewhat like that lucky pen you used to write your exams with and no new pen could have taken its place.I love my shoes and have been in love with many other football shoes at college and so I decided to run one last half marathon in the old pair.Preparing for the Corbett Half Marathon was a real tough task not much due to the summer but more due to the weekend travels for B-school interviews.But then from here life is going to be tough and I know I will have to find time to run.Running is a liberating activity probably one of the many means to connect with the soul,it is something which one can take up as a life long activity and the best part is that one is least dependent on others for this fun .Running in a National Park is something one dreams of and a lucky few get the opportunity to actually run.When you start the run you are surrounded by tall trees but somehow mentally at the end you stand taller than the trees.With Elephant dung on the road,dead leaves scattered all around, birds chirping,small streams passing  and an endless road one could ask no more from life.Compared to the Mumbai Half marathon , this was a difficult track with a continuous elevated surfaces to run on throughout the race and added to the the climb was the temperature and fatigue of reaching this place.I really felt happy to complete this race for it was a total test of endurance.Every km you run to prepare for the marathon tests your mental ability and then you come and find yourself in a totally new and a difficult track you learn more about yourself , you understand that you have it in you.The Corbett Half marathon will always remain in my mind whenever I come across a difficult situation in life.

On the road again

     Family,friends,passion and a career is all that one must look out of life. It will often be a balancing act among these choices and it is of paramount importance to get the right mix.It is of paramount importance to pursue happiness and not procrastinate it.Your idea of happiness may differ from my idea but one must see it as a river which has different course and name but the same destination.Let money be no bar in your journey because happiness lies within and you have to find it. I have found the Wilderness very appealing and have looked at the passing mountains with a childhood charm.Pack your bags and go into the wild for it is where the life lies.Thoreau once said,“In wildness is the preservation of the world.”   

Turn the Page

So how was your 4 years of college? Well,I had a cycle without breaks and it circled the institute successfully for 4 years.As a matter of fact I thoughtfully gifted it to a security guard and it is still doing its rounds in the holy place.Actually I got the brakes repaired umpteen number of times but the cycle wanted to break free so it remained brake free  most of the time.This will probably be the last week as a student here and plausibly the last late night at in the lab.On my way to the hostel I ask myself the question raised at the beginning of this paragraph and the answer is this cycle,we both survived and freewheeled the place.

Financially, these days are a nightmare owing to the outrageous rules of the hostel administration.I light the remaining half of the Godam Garam and thank the Germans for inventing a smoke which lasted so long.In fact I did time myself once and it lasts almost 1.7 times longer than a normal classic milds.Not only do I feel less guilty lighting 2 of these rather than 4 of those but also it has helped a lot in my budget.I feel hungry and curse myself for not stuffing some more rice at Andhra Mess.I have mastered the art of putting a lock on my door while I am inside the room.This is very important for me because if the newspaper guy finds me I will be more than a broke.I will have to sleep now because even a fifteen minutes delay in reaching Nandini means fair chances of the cheapest item getting over.Sometimes I laugh at all this but still continue living the way things are just for some fun , some experience with a pinch of salt. 

There are two kinds of people on this globe , one who listen to the same song over and over again and the others who  can sing at the top of their lungs to any goddamn song. I have missed these two types the most for  past few days.Probably I have missed the noise , the laughs and fun.Even the monkeys have deserted the place for lack of life in the wing.Ranvah and Hula have made these last days worth living and Topa has provided the occasional kicks one needs to keep living.Everyday I sleep in the hope that someone would knock and wake me up for the breakfast, at least it ensures a peaceful sleep.

“The clock is ticking” is scribbled on a wall in my room I read it once again as I switch off the lights.

Note: Had written this post during the last days of college but never got the time to edit and print.


“Would take u 5 years down the memory lane when on our first hostel night ,Tattu met with an accident and I spent the night with him in the hospital.”

To me friendship has been about moments.Certain experiences and moments in which I have learnt a lot about friendship.I have taken up and given up things on the basis of my experiences.But my experiments with friendship have been flawless.I have found it to be a very innocent and unselfish relationship.Accepting someone as it is without imposing one’s ideals is a great virtue.I feel that every other things tries to deter us away from the right(e.g. religion has a set of ideals which fall as correct) whereas friendship moves you closer to the truth.When others would have ridiculed it is friends which make your impossible goals to a possible one.Very few things makes you as strong as having a good friend.   Everyone needs an emotional confidence which friendship instills in our subconscious.

P.S. Taken from a discussion thread on FIKARNOT where I was asked to define my idea of friendship.

On Shawshank Redemption and a friend

I was watching the The Shawshank Redemption for the 6th time.In fact I have paused the movie to write this post, the reason being a friend.I watched it for the first time 6 years back with my roommate and at this very moment I was reminded of him.

I have very sporadic memories of the past.Some memories of which I remember every detail.One of those was of a night while returning from buying some grocery.I was 8 years old and feared the kabristan which came on the way to home.It was late, unusually quiet and a sudden gush of air terrified me.I knew bits and pieces of Hanuman Chalisa which I started chanting and ran the whole way to home.

But the first day of college is such a memory which everyone would recall.So it was the first evening when i met Dedh.I was amazed to see his apprehension on my being a Bihari.The first dinner in the mess was with dedh and mamme. When I saw the rice and sambhar in the hostel mess the only consolation was,“Chalo kha lenge yaar, bas sahi dost ban jayen.” A lifetime friendship always stars in funny ways , sometimes over sambhar chawal.I can write so many things about him but let there be some for memories.
This movie is about friendship and hope but for me it is also a happy memory which I will always cherish.

To quote a line from the movie ,”Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies.”  

End of an Era

5 years of wonderful time spent in Chennai ends today , though a shocking news(heavenly abode of a college friend) has diminished all the pleasure of wriitng this post however at the same point it is one of those lessons of life which life over the last 5 years has kept on preaching. 
The first time I went to the Besant Nagar beach I just jumped into the sea and for many of the next time it was the same. Slowly the relationship with the beach changed and it became more of a place to find peace, to spend good time with friends.Finally in the last year it became the place of solitude for me. Office being close to the beach and working late hours always resulted in me being at the beach when almost no one was there. Though there are a lots of things to write about Chennai but i chose this for a reason. The beach has seen my transition from a school kid to a gradutae,  adolescence to maturity, ignorant to reflective , no convictions to some strong ones and many more. 
Twenties is the age of transition and it happens in different ways to different people but i feel that for me there was a multitude of them and it was probably the crowd , the college, FRIENDS and the place which changed all for the good.
A small list of those plenty of places which i loved in Chennai
IITM(Especially the run around the insti , good that i was regular this month) ,Besant Nagar, ECR ( so many bike and car rides), Star Rock ( The music ) , SNS (king of all good times) , Water tank top in my PG , Local train rides in the evening with ipod and no one around , Theatres , Job ( met some great people there), OMR flat ( nostalgic) , Chennai Trekking club and so on ….
” All my bags are packed , i am ready to go … I hate to say you good bye.”


This is in continuation to the friends header i have for this month.
Just completed the last episode of the series and it reminds me of the fact that among the FIKARNOT group i was the one who had to watch most of my friends leaving one by one.
This is one of the Sundays , to be more precise a very rainy sunday in Chennai when i am all alone . I had an awesome farewell yesterday from my first job , i must admit that i was happy while resigning but it was again a hard, parting.I made a completely different set of friends in my first job and i got the taste of corporate too.I am sitting here writing this post thinking  of what is next. May be a new job but it is hard to decide , should it be finance , or may be a NGO , or CAT ,I really don’t know. I would have loved if someone was around but its fine i have one week to decide , probably u may help.
Everything aside goos to tell u that i am a completely different person today , the last 5 years made all the difference. Probably  I may be not as good as you all , i may have not deserves a life that i lived but i tried my best.
Will miss you all.


Had one of my most horrible days of life and also the day when i learnt  a lot in life , but they will be there for you 🙂

Game On

The last game was soon going to be over , people standing outside  were counting the minutes and anytime could have been the last move and probably the last time we four (Moli, Dedh , Danda and me ) would be playing together.

But, the light went off and good that  the Game never ended.

” Between, a day of tears , some cried alone, some had an audience but everyone present today had watery eyes